A Jig and Some Grog for One Annum! (or, "Happy First Birthday, HD")

A year ago today was the hardest, most painful, utterly life-changing, core-shaking, and most beautiful days of my entire life.  Days since then have contained a fair share of frustration, exhaustion, self-doubt.  But every single one of those days have contained some measure of hilarity, awe, and wonder at the amazing human bean that Hubs and I created (seriously, on a weekly basis we look at her doing something funny/awesome and one of us will exclaim, "We made that!!").

Kid, you are independent to a fault (you can thank your mama for that lovely trait/curse).  You are funny, and such a ham.  You will perform for anyone, and you're such a social butterfly at this early age!  Your love is deep and strong, if your near demolition of stuffed animals while you "cuddle" with them is any indication (yeah, we may wait a couple more years on getting a dog!).  You get bored easily, mostly with your food.  At age 1, you already know that variety is the spice of life.  But contradictorily, you are super loyal to your most favorite toys and books, repeatedly seeking out Where the Wild Things Are or your pink puppy dog.  You are inquisitive and kind, already trying to share your food with your parents, caressing our faces when we sing to you, and bestowing kisses upon all and sundry.  I hope you always love as hard as you do now.

We've seen a lot over the past year, here are some highlights, in no particular order:

Day one, our little sumo chick.

Age 2 months, your first vacation to the beach!

3 months = practically a teenager (i.e. disgust with parental photography)

Happy, happy, happy at 5 months

Belly scooting at 7 months-ish.

Cruising on over to the Easter Bunny

Your highly inappropriate parents think pics of babies with beer is funny.

Teeny weenie (almost a month?).

6 month "birthday" avocado treat!  And the only time we ever made you wear a headband!

   HD, your daddy and mama think you're the most awesome person ever.  Can't wait to see all the things you'll learn, accomplish, and become.  You may not always love pirates, Lyle Lovett, blueberries, puppies, and your mama's hair, but we hope you remain as confident, loving, and fun as you are now.  Love you, suge.

Doppelganger Cap'n Madre (or, "Guess What Celebrity My Daughter Thinks Is Me?")

HD's favorite activity of the moment is pulling out one of our boxes of DVDs and strewing them about.  She rifles through them, showing an odd favoritism for Crunch Fitness Fat Blasting Dance Workout.  That is, until she discovered her new favorite...

Where the Parrots Fly (or, "A Much Needed Break")

A couple weekends back, we made like parrots and flew south.  Although I suppose parrots don't exactly ever need to migrate.  Anyway, we decided to brave Southwest Airlines with a near-toddler and head to our old hometown to visit some old buddies.

Highlights include:

• Hanging with so many good friends.  Mad love going out to my girl Jasleen, Meghann and her daughter Kyleigh, my other Megan and Meaghan, Meredith, and Hubs's homeboys Clive and Paul.  I appreciate y'all taking the time to coo over our kid, and to give me real adult conversation as well :)
• Visited the gorgeous Getty Villa in Malibu.  Schooled HD in ancient Roman and Greco art, architecture, and ways of living.  She's been speaking Latin ever since!
• First experience in a pool.  The bebe didn't entirely freak out (no cries, just lots of clings), so we'll take that as a victory point.
• I got to visit my former life's version of Cheers.   Reminisced on the days when, truly, everyone at Q's really did know my name (in my defense, I lived across the street).



The Border Grill is hilaaaaarious.

• Visited the HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH -- UCLA!  Hubs and I are both alum (although, we didn't meet until after each of us had graduated), so naturally we had to give HD a tour of her inevitable future.  8 CLAP!!!



Hand to God, that plaque says "We Will Valet Your Stroller."

• Ate amazingly well.  Hats off to Border Grill's margaritas and the Godmother sandwich from Bay Cities Deli.  Also happy hour sushi, which is one of the things I missed most about LA.

Trying on laurel wreath props, getting our Roman comedy on.

HD, humoring our extreme Bruin exuberance (it's her FUTURE!).

Blue and gold look so very good on HD.

Finally, I think we'll make sure that every vacation includes a full length mirror:

Gal o' the Western Trade Winds (or, "Ways I Want the Kid to be a California Girl")

I mentioned previously my desire to instill some good ol' Southern values into my daughter.  I have a great amount of pride for some of my Southern upbringing, but I am equally proud of my years in California.  This is, afterall, the place where I became an adult.  I've lived in the two most influential cities this state has to offer, and there are definitely aspects of the lifestyle here that I hope HD will have throughout her life, no matter where she goes.

Here are the Top California Influences/Ideas I Hope HD Has in her Life:

1.  I hope she loves living the outdoorsy life.  This state has some of the nation's most beautiful national and state parks, small suburbs (whatup, Belmont!) and big cities alike are packed with well-maintained hiking trails, and Cali has a crazy range of eco-systems to experience -- redwood forests, insanely hot deserts, gorgeous beaches, gigundo mountains, you name it.  HD already adores hanging out in the yard or parks, so we're off to a great start.  If only the weather would actually decide to be springlike so we could be outside more often (*shakes fist at nearby ever-hovering marine layer*)...

2. Exposure to lots of international cuisine.  Hubs and I are adventurous eaters, and very proud of that.  We've loved exploring LA's Koreatown, finding the best Thai takeout, braving Indian lunch buffets, stalking the Tamale Lady in the Mission District.  I'm hoping HD's current love of hummus and garlic means that she won't only insist on cheese pizza or crustless PB&J in a couple of years. 

3.  CA is certainly not environmentally perfect (what place is?), but there are solid attempts to make green choices more accessible to the masses here in the Bay Area.  Yay for county-wide composting and recycling programs, taking the train to work, landmark greenhouse gas laws, and blockage of local offshore drilling.  HD, this state is at least attempting to bank on your generation's future :)

4.  The diversity here is astounding in every sense of the word -- religious, ethnic, sexual, economic.  I hope that we're always able to show HD that there are all kinds of families, traditions, cultures, holidays.  That what's normal for her isn't "normal" for everyone.

5.  That In'n'Out is a spectacular thing indeed.  Especially if you substitute ketchup/mustard instead (anyone else with me on that?  Thousand Island is totally barf inducing).

Lost at Sea (or, "Why We've Been MIA")

A couple of weeks ago, Blogger had some major issues. Not really sure what was up, but my last post was completely deleted and I couldn't access the site at all. Then, last weekend we had our first family vacation (one where we have no free babysitting from grandparents!) to lovely Los Angeles. We had tons of fun visiting old friends and visiting the alma mater.  More to come in a separate post, which will be delayed a few days due to a visit from Sandpaper Pappy!  HD is stoked to see her grandfather, and so am I.  Until then...

One Dubloon Short of a Full Chest (or, "11 Months Old")

My daughter is 11 months old today.  She's really only a baby for one more month!  And she's obviously really, really excited about it:

Mama, we discussed this.  Only candid shots post-nap; I'm done with posing.

Here's her "baby tricks" status to date:

• Has a small repitoire of words she says and actually understands, including Daddy/Dada, bye, hi/hey, "quack, quack" (yup, she says this whenever she sees ducks, inc. rubber ones), and puppy.  Although, puppy is slightly debatable, since she tends to call anything that makes her happy (inc. actual dogs) "puppy."  For example dogs, any and all stuffed animals, and yours truly are usually referred to as "puppy."  And to those of you wondering, yes, she can say Mama, but I think I'm in her face so much she doesn't really see the need to ever call my name.
• Climbing.  As in, up our entire staircase.  We're still working on the whole getting down portion.
• Standing on her own for, like, 3 seconds!  Impressive. 
• Not walking on her own just yet.  She loves cruising (walking while holding on to furniture) and really loves her alligator walker.  She loves it so much, she actually gets pissed off at other toys that aren't as awesome as her beloved walker.
• Threw her first full-on temper tantrum on Mother's Day.  We were up at the in-laws house, and her grandma had found an old toy of Hubs's, lovingly cleaned it up, and had it out for HD.  HD thought it was supposed to move around in the same way as the walker -- lo and behold, it did not.  Full blown wails and tears of frustration, leaving me to explain to everyone that no, she wasn't hurt.  Just going through toddler-hood a bit earlier than predicted. 
• Pointing at everything.  My favorite is when you ask her "Where are the pirates?" she points vehemently at this cool pirate flag garland that's hanging up in her room.  Pointing also means that she's able to indicate what she wants in ways other than crying.  Huzzah!

This time last year, I was in a holding pattern.  The last month of pregnancy isn't easy, and not just because of the beached whale/constant need to pee/tiny foot poking you in the ribs feeling.  It's a time where planning goes completely out the window, and you have to be ready for a new person to be in your life at any moment.  You begin to fully comprehend that you will be responsible for another person's safety, well-being, health, happiness.  There were times where I could feel that I was psyching myself out.  "I won't be good enough, I haven't prepared enough, I have no idea what I'm doing." 

But you breathe and ride out that final month.  And when she makes her appearance, she looks into your eyes for the first time as if to say, "Oh, it's you."  You fall instantly, madly in love.  And this tiny little person teaches you every day what it is that you're supposed to do, who it is that you're supposed to be.

Man, I can't wait to get home today to play with my kid.

A Lady by Way of Southern Shores ("Ways I Want the Kid to be a Carolina Girl")

I promised a video, and it's buried here in my diatribe, so keep reading!  Here's a photo to tide you over in the meantime:

This has nothing to do with anything.  But she's wearing pink patent loafers!

For those who aren't aware, I grew up in a bunch of vastly different places.  Abbreviated life story of the Cap'n: birth to age 7 in various towns in North Carolina; age 8 in Barbados (yes, that was the beginning of the whole pirate obsession); ages 9-16 in Spokane, WA; finished high school in a San Francisco Bay Area 'burb; finally down to Los Angeles for college (U-C-L-A! Fight! Fight! Fight!).  Adult life has since been split between LA and SF/surrounding area.  It's kind of an understatement to say that I got really used to being the new kid when I was growing up (until college, the longest I was in one school was 3 years). But I had a varied childhood and saw a lot more at an earlier age than most of my peers; wouldn't trade it for anything.

In looking at the two major bookends of my life, the Carolinas and California, I've been thinking a lot about what kinds of viewpoints I hope HD picks up in life.  Since her daddy has spent 30 of his 31 years in Cali, it's up to me to represent the Southern side of things.

My folks are Southern through and through -- they even retired in Charleston (the ultimate American pirate port, arrrrr!!!), which is as Old South as you can get.  I was definitely raised with a strong Southern influence cast over my life through them and my extended family, no matter where certain years were spent.  We took HD to Charleston for the first time earlier this year and had a blast.  People can say all they want about Southern bigotry, overzealous religion, or insane eating habits (they'd be right in a lot of cases) -- there are still amazing things about that part of the country.

Here are the Top Southern Influences/Ideas I Hope HD Has in her Life:

1)  A strong sense of community (Southerners are GREAT at this, whether it's the gossip mill in a small town, the regular church attendance, or a huge pie-bearing welcome wagon anytime a new neighbor moves in).  This kind of ties into general pride for any group you belong to.  You've never seen true team spirit or intense sorority sisterhood until you've visited an ACC school (Boston doesn't count).

2)  MANNERS.  I cannot stress this enough.  We're talking way beyond "please and thank you."  I miss "sir" and "ma'am," men standing slightly when a women sits or rises from the table, and making eye contact with strangers in the street and giving them a smile or nod.  Ain't nothing wrong with a little common courtesy (which I need to remind myself everyday to practice when I commute on the train with the blind masses).

3)  Cute and ladylike clothes.  Working on this currently, as evidenced by this sundress:

4)  Southerners are suckers for live music.  There's a lot more singing and dancing going on at random down there.  I love the sense of joy and unselfconsciousness it emanates.   HD would fit right in.

5)   Taking life a bit more slowly.  Maybe it's the accent, but Southerners are kings when it comes to pausing and allowing something to sink in.  Living near and working in a hectic city makes me very GOGOGO all the time.  My own mama can't understand about half of my crazy speed speak.  In fact, this is what I must sound like to her: